The need.

Happy New Year! I have a feeling this one will be a good one. I ended 2013 with my first experiences of being controlled, and look forward to many many more in the future.

It’s crazy to me how something that was just a fantasy such a short time ago has almost become a need.   I find myself constantly craving more.   I find myself longing to be used, for the satisfaction I feel afterward, and the aches and pains that continue into the next days.  I want to feel that way again.

Yesterday, after several days of intense need, and a lot of begging I was allowed to play with myself. Only stipulation being, I wasn’t able to come. It was such a relief to just rub my pussy. And rub I did. I edged myself several times and stayed that way the last time until I couldn’t take it any more. Then I just squirmed and whimpered until I fell asleep. It must have been just what I needed because I slept great.

This mornings email let me know that he approved of me and last nights play session, which was well documented to him in emails and pictures. His approval gives me a sense of pride. I will wear this smile all day, and probably nothing else. 😉

I was also instructed to try out one of my newest toys. But only given permission to see how much I could handle. I was too see how big I could handle the inflatable plug in each hole. After doing this, removing the plug and reporting to him, I feel like I was woke up for a morning quickie, without any regard for my pleasure. Used for a quick fuck, only for him to get off. I love it, this is what I need. The feeling of being used.

Now I’m back in bed, squirming. I need more. I’ve become a cock hungry whore.

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